This is hilarious. My view of Christianity is becoming somewhat cynical. I'm not sure what to think about Christians at times. Is it jealousy? Is it genuine conviction in my heart? I'm not sure, but I'm not too sure I like it.
This weekend:
This weekend was my birthday weekend! I went to Winter Camp '08 with my CCF Core (small group) and had a blast! One of the first things I realized was that I was growing more and more intimate about the most seriously in my life (my relationship with God) with people I barely know. A lot of good things happened this weekend, but I specifically want to share one event.
I met a girl:
"What the heck, Joe?" Hear the story out! I have to start with the lamest part. Some guy said this, "Don't you hate it when you listen so intently and hear nothing?" Bah! So, I was listening to her story and didn't remember her name! I remember her parent's names, though. Jim and Karen. I'll get back to those later. Anywho, I was responding the the message God was speaking through Brady on Saturday night, and I turned to the right and asked Core Leader Jeffe Springer to pray for me to find a deeper love of diving into God's Word. I found myself in a rut, but pressed through continuing to pray. All weekend there was a girl who caught my attention. She is gorgeous, let's get that out of the way upfront. Here's the deal, though. She caught my attention and I literally asked this question to God, "God, what do you want me to see in this girl?" I brushed it off, and prayed for her to find what God was looking for her this weekend. Craziness. I went to a session that night called Sex, sex, sex... what about relationship? Awkward, right? Nah, it gets worse, she was there, too! (I can't believe I don't remember her name.) I came in late and didn't sit next to a few of my friends because she probably would've noticed me, y'know? I'm such a dork. Well, the rut was this. I wanted to pray, but God kept bringing her to my attention. It was distracting me from worship and prayer, normally that's not a good thing, so I started praying for her and all of a sudden... "Mom" came up in my heart. I didn't understand this at first, but I started crying BIG-TIME and started praying for my mom. She (seriously, once she contacts me through facebook I'll tell her about my blogs, she might make fun of me big time for not knowing her name!) came up and layed her hand on me. I instantly knew it was her because her voice calmed my screaming heart praying for my mom. I started praying for my dad next. My parents aren't saved. I maintain composure and sit up. She spoke, and the night flipped. This girl whom God was bringing my attention to has my story. We talked about it, and it was awesome to see someone else with the same heart for their parents. I'm not going to make this anymore significant than it is, but I'm going to let this out so it doesn't remain a stumbling block in my life. I found out she's in a pretty serious relationship... (hear me out guys!!) It's lame to me because I know she's going to be a wonderful mother one day. I'm going to keep her and her parents (Jim and Karen) in my prayers. It was one of the most beautiful nights I've ever experienced, Jesus really is the author and perfecter of my soul! Beautiful work, Jesus!
Hopefully, we do get in contact with each other, within the next few weeks I'm going to tell my dad everything God has been doing my heart and tell my dad I love him. It's going to be awesome!
That's it. This weekend rocked, but it's only a foundation to a great life to follow!
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Thursday, January 10, 2008
You know you have a problem when...
You blog at the library. I'm such a dork! Anyways, I'm now ready through the book of Samuel, and... God's really maturing my heart. I couldn't wait until I got home... I have to write about it now!!
_____________________________________________________________________
1 Samuel 15:1-3
1 Samuel said to Saul, "I am the one the LORD sent to anoint you king over his people Israel; so listen now to the message from the LORD. 2 This is what the LORD Almighty says: 'I will punish the Amalekites for what they did to Israel when they waylaid them as they came up from Egypt. 3 Now go, attack the Amalekites and totally destroy everything that belongs to them. Do not spare them; put to death men and women, children and infants, cattle and sheep, camels and donkeys.' "
'I will punish the Amalekites.. Do not spare them...'
Lesson #1: Listen!
God said that He would punish them. Remember: Obeying God doesn't help you receive merit of any kind... It really doesn't benefit us at all. Everything is in God's hands... He'll get it done, but it is a priveledge to be used by God. Actually, at first, when I read this, I was confused. "How could God do something like this?" Let me tell you quite simply... He's God. Don't worry about it and don't let your emotions or even reason get in the way. Pray about it if you unsure, but if you didn't hear God clearly the first time, He's probably going to repeat Himself exactly as He did before. :)
1 Samuel 15:9
But Saul and the army spared Agag and the best of the sheep and cattle, the fat calves and lambs—everything that was good. These they were unwilling to destroy completely, but everything that was despised and weak they totally destroyed.
Lesson #2: Obey God, not what is 'good.'
"No one is good—except God alone." I'm not sure if this is fully in context, but hear this out and challenge this idea. Jesus said this to a ruler who didn't think Jesus was God, but a 'good teacher.' Here it is in a mathematical equation:
_____________________________________________________________________
Given:
x = Jesus obeys God fully (Sent by God to express His love for us... His plan from the beginning (the Will of God).
Unknowns:
y = our decision (obey or not...)
We need to move on from the concept that Jesus was a good guy. We need to understand that Jesus is God and God knows what He's doing... Trust Him, already!
Through John 14:6-7 we know that
"I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."
Therefore: if x = y, then you're doing the Will of God.
_____________________________________________________________________
We can allow our emotions to clash with our decisions and Jesus warns us of this problem when He challenges us with the idea of becoming His disciple:
Luke 14:26-27
26"If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple. 27And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple.
Don't let anything hinder you. It may hinder you, but as I approach what Jesus said, I think of how hate makes us scrappy... Willing to do anything to accomplish our goal... Even act foolish. Don't let your emotions hinder you, but allow your passions to compel you into action.
_____________________________________________________________________
1 Samuel 15:20
20 "But I did obey the LORD," Saul said. "I went on the mission the LORD assigned me. I completely destroyed the Amalekites and brought back Agag their king. 21 The soldiers took sheep and cattle from the plunder, the best of what was devoted to God, in order to sacrifice them to the LORD your God at Gilgal."
22 But Samuel replied: "Does the LORD delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as much as in obeying the voice of the LORD ? To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams.
23 For rebellion is like the sin of divination, and arrogance like the evil of idolatry. Because you have rejected the word of the LORD, he has rejected you as king."
"I went on the mission the Lord assigned me." I love how we go where God wants us to go, but we are consumed with this idea that we have to prove something to God. God is pretty straight forward... He loves full obedience. Sure, our employers love initiative, the only initiative God wants from us is to seek Him first, because then His will is done. (If you want to add to this idea, by all means... do it!) Samuel says this pretty well in his response to Saul's decision...
1 Samuel 15:22-23
22 But Samuel replied: "Does the LORD delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as much as in obeying the voice of the LORD ? To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams. 23 For rebellion is like the sin of divination, and arrogance like the evil of idolatry. Because you have rejected the word of the LORD, he has rejected you as king."
Full obedience. I'm not so good at that... now what?
_____________________________________________________________________
1 Samuel 15:24-25
24 Then Saul said to Samuel, "I have sinned. I violated the LORD's command and your instructions. I was afraid of the people and so I gave in to them. 25 Now I beg you, forgive my sin and come back with me, so that I may worship the LORD."
Everything I said before was pretty straight forward, but here's where God put a change in my life. I used to love this scripture... The heart of Saul. As I read it now, my perception differs. The question that came to my head was this: "Why didn't you worship God by obeying Him?"
_____________________________________________________________________
Lesson #3: Don't be a hypocrit.
Luke 6:38
"Give, and it will be given to you. They will pour into your lap a good measure-- pressed down, shaken together, and running over. For by your standard of measure it will be measured to you in return."
Why didn't Saul worship God before he messed up?
_____________________________________________________________________
Lesson #4: Pray
Jesus, I want to listen to You the first time. Jesus, may I be ready... if I'm not ready then eager to make the adjustments necessary to obey You. Jesus, You're God. And I want to be Your faithful servant. Help me understand what it means to truly be Your disciple.
_____________________________________________________________________
1 Samuel 15:1-3
1 Samuel said to Saul, "I am the one the LORD sent to anoint you king over his people Israel; so listen now to the message from the LORD. 2 This is what the LORD Almighty says: 'I will punish the Amalekites for what they did to Israel when they waylaid them as they came up from Egypt. 3 Now go, attack the Amalekites and totally destroy everything that belongs to them. Do not spare them; put to death men and women, children and infants, cattle and sheep, camels and donkeys.' "
'I will punish the Amalekites.. Do not spare them...'
Lesson #1: Listen!
God said that He would punish them. Remember: Obeying God doesn't help you receive merit of any kind... It really doesn't benefit us at all. Everything is in God's hands... He'll get it done, but it is a priveledge to be used by God. Actually, at first, when I read this, I was confused. "How could God do something like this?" Let me tell you quite simply... He's God. Don't worry about it and don't let your emotions or even reason get in the way. Pray about it if you unsure, but if you didn't hear God clearly the first time, He's probably going to repeat Himself exactly as He did before. :)
1 Samuel 15:9
But Saul and the army spared Agag and the best of the sheep and cattle, the fat calves and lambs—everything that was good. These they were unwilling to destroy completely, but everything that was despised and weak they totally destroyed.
Lesson #2: Obey God, not what is 'good.'
"No one is good—except God alone." I'm not sure if this is fully in context, but hear this out and challenge this idea. Jesus said this to a ruler who didn't think Jesus was God, but a 'good teacher.' Here it is in a mathematical equation:
_____________________________________________________________________
Given:
x = Jesus obeys God fully (Sent by God to express His love for us... His plan from the beginning (the Will of God).
Unknowns:
y = our decision (obey or not...)
We need to move on from the concept that Jesus was a good guy. We need to understand that Jesus is God and God knows what He's doing... Trust Him, already!
Through John 14:6-7 we know that
"I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."
Therefore: if x = y, then you're doing the Will of God.
_____________________________________________________________________
We can allow our emotions to clash with our decisions and Jesus warns us of this problem when He challenges us with the idea of becoming His disciple:
Luke 14:26-27
26"If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters—yes, even his own life—he cannot be my disciple. 27And anyone who does not carry his cross and follow me cannot be my disciple.
Don't let anything hinder you. It may hinder you, but as I approach what Jesus said, I think of how hate makes us scrappy... Willing to do anything to accomplish our goal... Even act foolish. Don't let your emotions hinder you, but allow your passions to compel you into action.
_____________________________________________________________________
1 Samuel 15:20
20 "But I did obey the LORD," Saul said. "I went on the mission the LORD assigned me. I completely destroyed the Amalekites and brought back Agag their king. 21 The soldiers took sheep and cattle from the plunder, the best of what was devoted to God, in order to sacrifice them to the LORD your God at Gilgal."
22 But Samuel replied: "Does the LORD delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as much as in obeying the voice of the LORD ? To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams.
23 For rebellion is like the sin of divination, and arrogance like the evil of idolatry. Because you have rejected the word of the LORD, he has rejected you as king."
"I went on the mission the Lord assigned me." I love how we go where God wants us to go, but we are consumed with this idea that we have to prove something to God. God is pretty straight forward... He loves full obedience. Sure, our employers love initiative, the only initiative God wants from us is to seek Him first, because then His will is done. (If you want to add to this idea, by all means... do it!) Samuel says this pretty well in his response to Saul's decision...
1 Samuel 15:22-23
22 But Samuel replied: "Does the LORD delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices as much as in obeying the voice of the LORD ? To obey is better than sacrifice, and to heed is better than the fat of rams. 23 For rebellion is like the sin of divination, and arrogance like the evil of idolatry. Because you have rejected the word of the LORD, he has rejected you as king."
Full obedience. I'm not so good at that... now what?
_____________________________________________________________________
1 Samuel 15:24-25
24 Then Saul said to Samuel, "I have sinned. I violated the LORD's command and your instructions. I was afraid of the people and so I gave in to them. 25 Now I beg you, forgive my sin and come back with me, so that I may worship the LORD."
Everything I said before was pretty straight forward, but here's where God put a change in my life. I used to love this scripture... The heart of Saul. As I read it now, my perception differs. The question that came to my head was this: "Why didn't you worship God by obeying Him?"
_____________________________________________________________________
Lesson #3: Don't be a hypocrit.
Luke 6:38
"Give, and it will be given to you. They will pour into your lap a good measure-- pressed down, shaken together, and running over. For by your standard of measure it will be measured to you in return."
Why didn't Saul worship God before he messed up?
_____________________________________________________________________
Lesson #4: Pray
Jesus, I want to listen to You the first time. Jesus, may I be ready... if I'm not ready then eager to make the adjustments necessary to obey You. Jesus, You're God. And I want to be Your faithful servant. Help me understand what it means to truly be Your disciple.
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
What a day!
Days like today don't come around often. It's hilarious... Most guys I know have probably been through a lot of it, but for me it's different. A girl gave me her number!
When it happened I was confused and didn't really know how to embrace it, but I learned. God, I want to honor You. Thanks for a little glimpse of encouragement that I'm not that bad. :) We wrote notes back and forth for a couple of moments (we were literally sitting RIGHT next to each other...) and the next thing you know I have a girls phone number! Whew!
1 Samuel 12:20-25
When it happened I was confused and didn't really know how to embrace it, but I learned. God, I want to honor You. Thanks for a little glimpse of encouragement that I'm not that bad. :) We wrote notes back and forth for a couple of moments (we were literally sitting RIGHT next to each other...) and the next thing you know I have a girls phone number! Whew!
1 Samuel 12:20-25
20 "Do not be afraid," Samuel replied. "You have done all this evil; yet do not turn away from the LORD, but serve the LORD with all your heart. 21 Do not turn away after useless idols. They can do you no good, nor can they rescue you, because they are useless. 22 For the sake of his great name the LORD will not reject his people, because the LORD was pleased to make you his own. 23 As for me, far be it from me that I should sin against the LORD by failing to pray for you. And I will teach you the way that is good and right. 24 But be sure to fear the LORD and serve him faithfully with all your heart; consider what great things he has done for you. 25 Yet if you persist in doing evil, both you and your king will be swept away."
God keeps us in check. He maintains accountability to ensure our success. The Israelite people have rejected God and chose Saul (the looser..) as king. '... the Lord will not reject his people, because the Lord was pleased to make you His own." Please to make us His own. Lord, may we not forget the grace You give us, the love You pour upon us. I desire to do as Samuel requests... Fear You, God and serve You faithfully with all my heart. Lord, thanks for everything.. I love You, God.
-Joe
Monday, January 7, 2008
Joe's thoughts on ... Girls
I don't get it.
Girls are awesome. I'm caught in a mess right now and I'm not going to spill out a ton of scripture, but I'm simply going to talk out what's been going on and calm my heart down to finally yield to the Holy Spirit.
Story:
I've been fully taken over by hormones. It's official that I'm an average guy. The difference between me and other men is that I've been touched by the Spirit of God, called to live a life for Him. It's ridiculous. My accessibility to feed my sensual desires is almost literally at my finger tips. I've got to learn. I have to understand that women/girls/ladies are all my sisters in the family of God.
I've learned to honor my Mom - sweet!
I've learned to honor my sister - SICK!!
- I need to learn how to honor God more fully, by how I deal with women.
I do not want to be 'burned' with passion. If I could've done anything different, I would have refrained from dating in High School. Not only would I not be in the situation I am right now, but those ladies would probably still talk to me and maybe I would be sitting here today with a pure heart. It's no one's fault but my own, and I can't take anything I did in the past back. I have to bear it DAILY to walk closer and closer to God. Right now, my heart is progressing and the wounds are deep. And Phil, I'm stoked to know that those scars will be encouraging to another man's testimony. Let's hope I'm obedient and get to the guys the Lord has called me to.
Situation:
School! New classes, new people, new situation. Pretty ladies EVERYWHERE! I'd LOVE to have Liz's gift. I guess any girls gift, haha. She said that the boy situation in Louisiana is 'irrelevant.' For me, I love hanging out with awesome ladies. Primarily, I almost always (95% of the time) hang out with guys. It's not that big of a deal, but I know it impacts me. If I can't honor women now, outside of marriage, how can I honor a woman in marriage? It's not practice in my mind right now, it's development... discipline. I want to learn how to honor women, not run away because of my current/past failures.
Jesus:
I love You. I'm messing up everywhere... I'm slacking a bit in school, but I'm working on it. I'm slacking in emotional development, but I'm working on it. I'm slacking in discipline to You, but I'm working on it. Jesus, help me to grow closer to You, first, and to honor Your creation, second. Help me keep this in perspective.
Well, that's it for now... I'm going to work out and prepare myself for class. Later!
Girls are awesome. I'm caught in a mess right now and I'm not going to spill out a ton of scripture, but I'm simply going to talk out what's been going on and calm my heart down to finally yield to the Holy Spirit.
Story:
I've been fully taken over by hormones. It's official that I'm an average guy. The difference between me and other men is that I've been touched by the Spirit of God, called to live a life for Him. It's ridiculous. My accessibility to feed my sensual desires is almost literally at my finger tips. I've got to learn. I have to understand that women/girls/ladies are all my sisters in the family of God.
I've learned to honor my Mom - sweet!
I've learned to honor my sister - SICK!!
- I need to learn how to honor God more fully, by how I deal with women.
I do not want to be 'burned' with passion. If I could've done anything different, I would have refrained from dating in High School. Not only would I not be in the situation I am right now, but those ladies would probably still talk to me and maybe I would be sitting here today with a pure heart. It's no one's fault but my own, and I can't take anything I did in the past back. I have to bear it DAILY to walk closer and closer to God. Right now, my heart is progressing and the wounds are deep. And Phil, I'm stoked to know that those scars will be encouraging to another man's testimony. Let's hope I'm obedient and get to the guys the Lord has called me to.
Situation:
School! New classes, new people, new situation. Pretty ladies EVERYWHERE! I'd LOVE to have Liz's gift. I guess any girls gift, haha. She said that the boy situation in Louisiana is 'irrelevant.' For me, I love hanging out with awesome ladies. Primarily, I almost always (95% of the time) hang out with guys. It's not that big of a deal, but I know it impacts me. If I can't honor women now, outside of marriage, how can I honor a woman in marriage? It's not practice in my mind right now, it's development... discipline. I want to learn how to honor women, not run away because of my current/past failures.
Jesus:
I love You. I'm messing up everywhere... I'm slacking a bit in school, but I'm working on it. I'm slacking in emotional development, but I'm working on it. I'm slacking in discipline to You, but I'm working on it. Jesus, help me to grow closer to You, first, and to honor Your creation, second. Help me keep this in perspective.
Well, that's it for now... I'm going to work out and prepare myself for class. Later!
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